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Showing posts with label tips for better daily living. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tips for better daily living. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 2, 2019

Am I a Creature of Habit?

Grocery shopping – who can relate?

It’s not like we can ignore the need to purchase food products. Whether we shop in big box chains or the corner greengrocer, the majority of us will grocery shop.

But shoppers, like planets aligning around the sun, tend to gravitate to their normal shops.

I visited one of the local grocery stores this weekend – not an unusual occurrence for my weekends – but it wasn’t my ‘normal’ shop.
In the states, grocery chains are huge; one store seemingly much like the next.

EXCEPT

Chains may share a common name, stock basically the same groceries, even offer like discounts, but serious grocery shoppers (I’d be in that category) can attest that differences – small & great – exist among stores within the same chain.
This particular grocery-shopping experience won’t make one of my top ten excursion experiences.
What went wrong?

1) The aisles were T-tiny. That’s Southern for waaay too small. Aisles, especially those in the South, should be wide enough to hold buggy races. And I’m talking lined up side-by-side at the starting gate and racing down the straight away. Yep, that’s the right size.

2) Item signs: those that were visible required 20-15 or maybe 20-10 vision. UNCORRECTED! It was rather like watching baby turkeys in a rainstorm. Everybody looking up, squinting, and bumping into their fellow shoppers. Small signs leads to Road Rage. No really, it’s a scientific fact known by grocery shoppers everywhere.

3) Stocking during peak hours: As a good 80% of the chains are open round the clock or into the wee hours, stocking should NOT take place when loads of hungry, cranky shoppers are crowding too small aisles, looking for products that aren’t listed on any sign. Refer to Road Rage again.









Okay, so why didn’t I just leave and wait to buy groceries later? Why didn’t I go to another, possibly different chain, on down the road? Why didn’t I drive across town to find my ‘normal’ shop?



All good questions.

How, exactly does being a Creature of Habit impact grocery shopping?

How does being a Creature of Habit impact daily life?

And why should you, a fellow Creature of Habit, care?






We are ALL creatures of habit. And those habits personally & profoundly influence our lives.
If you’re a writer, the ‘creature of habit’ rule influences your characters’ lives.

UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPTUAL BASIC (don’t get lost in the lingo – keep reading).
Psychology Today has an interesting take on this behavior. Click the link if you want the entire article or let me tuck it in a nutshell for you.


1) We’re creatures. Seems obvious. But the meaning behind that tidbit is that we have certain physical needs that motivate – or push – behaviors to become automatic.

We’re hungry (NEED); we eat (BEHAVIOR).

Suffice it to say that body actions & reactions govern needs that turn into behaviors.


2) We’re, generally, social creatures. Obscure, but accurate. Most of us crave interactions.

We’re lonely or bored (NEED); we leave our shelter and seek out others like – and sometime not like – us (BEHAVIOR).


**This is simplifying needs & responses, but the point is that ‘needy’ factors govern our lives.**



First - How then do we become creatures of habit?

Simple.
If every daily task required studious thought and tedious attention to the step-by-step process, we’d get little accomplished. Most would be overwhelmed by the thought of beginning one multi-step behavior after another.
Consider your morning routine.
We’ll keep it simple. Take 3 basics:

Morning bathroom ablutions
Dressing for the day
Breakfast preparations


Now, consider how many steps go into each process. If you were required to focus on each step to start your morning, how far would you get into the day? Hence, the habit or habits.




If you’re looking to change a bad habit, understand your existing habits, or work with kids’ habits, read some of these articles:


7 Steps to changing a Bad Habit
Human Beings Examined as Creatures of Habit
Back to School, Back to Routines




Second – Personally, what’s the impact?




The good news is habits keep life moving, keep individuals focused, and allow for goals to be realized.
Exercise – it’s habit. Few start an exercise program because they wake up one day and can’t think of another single thing to entertain. No, it boils down to more essential facts.
1) The doctor orders/warns/threatens (with dire consequences) you do it.
2) A spouse, family member, friend motivates you to do it.
3) A training partner dares – or challenges – you to do it.
Eat healthier – it’s habit. See you know where this is going.
Sleep more . . . study more effectively . . . take play time. WAIT! Really? Folks need to develop the habit to take play time. Yes. Every one of us could name at least one individual who falls into the ‘workaholic’ category.

The bad news is that bad habits are easy to develop. See the above articles. Just like water, folks will take the path of least resistance. That leads to procrastination, lazy behaviors, terrible eating/sleeping/exercising habits, poor work attitudes.
Self-starting, resolve to complete, ability to meet deadlines: all healthy behaviors take a degree of mental toughness and a tenacity to stick to good habits to offset bad ones.

The ugly news
is that routines and our ‘creature of habit’ tendencies put as at risk to the unscrupulous types. Broadcasting routines can lead to dangerous results.
Do you jog alone? Always along the same path?
Do you habitually park in the same spot at the grocery store?
Do you or a family member leave the garage door remote in the car at night?
Is your in-car GPS programmed with HOME?
When you leave town, do you check-in via social media while at the airport, bus, or train station?



None of this is to make you paranoid. Well, perhaps a bit. More importantly, it’s to make you aware. While cultivating our creature of habit tendencies is part of life, learning to vary those same behaviors can keep us safe.

Third & finally – as writers, attention to detail MUST be paid to a character’s habits. Understanding the motivation or reasoning behind those habits is crucial, but that discussion is for another blog post.

When developing a character schematic or diagram consider:

1) Which behaviors or habits would be obvious based on:
a. Character’s career (consider the difference between the truck driver and the attorney),
b. Character’s education (consider the difference between one who struggled to obtain a GED as to the silver-spoon ivy-leaguer),
c. Character’s life choices (single to married; activist to hermit; corporate ladder-climber to civil servant).
**Disclaimer** Please don’t leave a response to point out that these life choices may or may not be polar opposites. They weren’t designed to be. Characters’ history, back-story, education, career will all impact behaviors and habits and need to be considered – seriously – when writing.





2) If utilizing suspense, horror, or dramatic elements in a novel, then a careful and detailed analysis must be sketched for any and ALL villains. Without focusing on the layers of the suspense, writers will deprive readers of much needed motivation.




Along Came A Spider by James Paterson is one of the most keen to illustrate this point. Multiple layers of villains, each with their own agenda, and each character onion to be peeled before the ultimate crime can be solved.
















3) Consider how the creature of habit behaviors can be utilized in weaving the suspense or horror element into the plot line. Don’t be afraid to consider the obvious and then tweak it to the unexpected.




Writers, if unsure how this specially plays into a plotline, please read J.D. Robb’s In Death series. As Lt. Eve Dallas, main protagonist and a homicide detective, focuses intensely on the normal routines of murder victims, she whittles down a suspect list until arrowing in on the ‘who-done-it’. Innocent In Death, my current read, refers to ‘creatures of habit’ in the opening Eve Dallas scene. Broad strokes to narrow lines, the use of everyday is vital in building and then solving suspense. If you prefer a more classic read: select Agatha Christie.












Being creatures of habit is UNAVOIDABLE and not a bad thing. Remember, that your life would move at a snail’s pace if not for scads of daily habits. But never forget to vary your routine for safety sake, and if a writer, never forget to layer in the normal to build the suspense.



Friday, March 15, 2019

Summer Time Fun in Fort Worth -- 5 TEXAS bars Worth The Stop!


Travelling to Texas this summer?

Then stroll in for a cool (TALL) drink at any of these bars.

The heat may bake Texas asphalt, but the sippin' is easy when you know where to belly up to the bar.


Much is touted about the large tourists’ bars and Historic stockyard bars in Fort Worth, Texas. Certainly, if you’ve never strolled down old brick streets, smelled lingering scents of longhorn cattle, meandered among tall cowboy hats and towering Texas hair, you need to visit the Historic edge of Fort Worth.
However, there is a great deal more to Fort Worth – not the cosmopolitan feel of Dallas, not the Jazz beat of Denton, or even the rolling hills, eclectic sense of Austin – no, Fort Worth is sleek, high-rise towers, tucked among historic revitalized brick buildings (even a few brick streets as well), stunning city parks, a square with dancing water, and a thriving downtown area -- simply put: Fort Worth is more than your average Honky-Tonk.

If you find yourself visiting Cowtown, but not looking for the standard tourist stops, then consider cooling your parched throat at one of these watering holes.

The Library – 611 Houston Street, Fort Worth, Texas. On the perimeter of Sundance Square and along the Molly the Trolley route, this wooden floor, leather-couched bar is open and welcoming. Meshed against towering 20 foot walls, and well above patrons’ heads, are book-lined shelves. There are a few shelves within reaching distance for those who’d like to have a quiet drink and a contemplative read. A small patio area is available and with the surrounding buildings shade can be found in spite of late afternoon sun. The four-sided bar makes easy access for those who want to place their own order or the multiple couches are ready for the weary of strolling. There is a ‘bar’ menu, but we didn’t check out the offerings. Happy hour is an afternoon treat here.





Thompson’s Bookstore – 900 Houston St, Fort Worth, Texas. From the front entrance across hardwood floors, lush sitting areas are staged for the enjoyment of the aficionado of fine cocktails. The ‘house’ rules alone make this a bar stop worth the visit. The bartenders should be termed ‘mixologist’ as the subtle flavors and nuance of cocktails are their specialty. No matter your favorite liquor or brand (bottom shelf to top) this subtlety elegant bar is a lovely respite from Texas heat. Not to worry if you’re strolling in your shorts and t-shirt, casual attire is welcome, but an inside voice is encouraged. If wild and raucous is on your menu, then there are plenty of other Fort Worth bars more to your style. Now, as an update -- your quiet voice works well during the week, but I've been inside these walls on the weekend and it's a hopping & joyful place. A great enticement to visit Thursday through Saturday is the downstairs 'speak-easy'. No fooling, pardner. Buy a drink at the upstairs bar and on the bottom of your receipt will be the 'secret code' to gain access to the tucked-away, downstairs hide-out. It's a cool throw back to the 20s and well worth the price of admission.





















Scatz Jazz Lounge – 111 W 4th, Ste 11, Fort Worth, Texas. A little crazy, a little spicy, and a lot of speakeasy edge best describes the Scatz Jazz Lounge. Heed the Google directions as this getaway is tucked down an alley. Descend in the elevator and enter a jazz environment to make your toes tap and hips sway. Cover required on some nights, not on others; so check their schedule. Excellent talent fills their stage – and sometimes marches around the room with a little New Orleans flavor – bartenders know their drinks and the clientele are there to enjoy excellent music.




























Whiskey & Rye, 1300 Houston St, Omni Hotel, Fort Worth, Texas. For those who want a bit more cultured environment, stop by the Omni – doesn’t that say it all – and enjoy a cocktail while snuggled in deep leather seats. Prompt wait staff, still with that Texas ‘howdy’ welcome; the occasional entertainer on their small stage; the quiet click of pool balls on the expensive carved tables and valet service right out the front door.
















Pete’s Dueling Piano Bar – 621 Houston St. Fort Worth, Texas. For those who want to group-date, celebrate a graduation or upcoming wedded bliss, or just spend several hours rubbing elbows with their fellow humans in a lively musical stop – this is the place. Expect great music – loud at times; happy, hollering folks – also loud at times; and a good evening. Not for the boot-scooting, Stetson-sporting, bronco-belt buckle type, but if you love a rowdy crowd with a backdrop of ivory-tickling, hammer-pounding musicians then visit Pete’s.




Howdy, and Welcome to Fort Worth.

















Other great Texas spots to visit!


Travelling Texas BackRoads



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